Korean Funeral Etiquette: How Foreign Guests Should Pay Condolences (3-Day 장례식 Format Decoded)

KunStudio · K-Wisdom Series · 2026-05-03

Most Korean funerals last 3 days (3일장 - sam-il-jang). The body is at the funeral hall (장례식장). Day 1: 영안실 (mortuary room). Day 2: visitation (chinyooja - 친지유족 + visitors). Day 3: cremation/burial. Foreign visitors typically attend Day 2 visitation. What you do in those 30 minutes determines whether the family considers you family-level or stranger-level for the rest of your relationship.

Dress code: black or very dark navy. White is for the immediate family (Korean traditional mourning color, opposite of Western). No bright colors. Conservative — covered shoulders for women, suit/tie for men. Traditional Korean funeral robe (상복) only for immediate family.

Condolence visit protocol: 1) Arrive at funeral hall, find correct room (multiple wakes happen simultaneously — check the digital board). 2) Sign visitor book (상가). 3) Hand condolence money envelope at registration. 4) Bow to the deceased's photo at altar (jeoldari - 절단). 5) Greet immediate family — bow once silently, brief words. 6) Brief stay at meal table if invited.

Condolence money (부조금) etiquette: white envelope (별지) with your name. Standard amounts in 2026: 50,000 won (acquaintance), 100,000 (friends), 200,000+ (family/close friends). Black ink for writing name (NOT red — red is for living person celebrations). Avoid 4 (사) digit amounts.

The bow at altar (절단): 1) Stand in front of altar with deceased's photo. 2) Light incense (1 stick, place upright in burner). 3) Step back. 4) Bow twice (절 두 번) — hands joined, men left over right, women right over left. 5) Then deeper full bow (큰절) once. 6) Step aside, face family. 7) Bow once to family. 8) Brief silent words: '얼마나 슬프시겠어요' (how saddened you must be). What NOT to say: '잘 가셨어요' (s/he passed peacefully) — too casual. Never ask cause of death. Our PDF guide includes the full ritual + memorial ceremony 제사 + cremation vs burial choice.